A Minor Quandary

April 27, 2007 at 8:47 am | Posted in jobs | 24 Comments

Seeing as it’s Friday, and nobody should be doing any work on a Friday, I was hoping the blogging community could help me make an important decision.

Here’s the thing: I’ve got that job. I’ve definitely got that job. However, I have not yet received the formal offer – it’s coming out on Monday or Tuesday of next week.

Today, one of the lads on the team (a team which consists of two people, myself and this pup) is leaving, and many people in our department (including managers, directors, etc) are off to get riotously drunk and talk bollocks for the evening. I had hoped to be able to hand in my notice today, so that I could make tonight a double celebration. Well, not just that. The truth is, I am afraid that once I get buckled, I will let it slip that I am leaving. This is not the right forum to announce that I’m leaving, particularly because they’re a good company and I don’t want to burn my bridges. Not only this, but some people on the night out know I’m going, others don’t. Risky, when you consider the amount of drink involved.

On a worldwide scale, an insignificant problem, you’ll agree. On a personal level though, it’s a recipe for absolute fucking disaster if my managers were to find out I’m leaving like that, instead of me being up-front in the office about it. So, I am debating.

Option 1: I hand in my notice today without having 100% security that I am happy about taking the new job and its attendant terms and conditions.

Option 2: I do my best to keep my mouth shut, and also hope that everyone else who knows about the job offer can do the same, all the while tempting fate by getting absolutely shitfaced.

What to do? And don’t give me this shite about going easy on the drink – that’s patently impossible. I only get about half a dozen nights out a year, so ossification is imminent. Oooh yes. As Francie Barrett‘s father said when his son was going to the Olympics “the bonfires will be lit tonight”.

Incidentally, I went to primary school with Francie, and his brother Jimmy. He and his brother Jimmy were sound.

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24 Comments »

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  1. Ring your new job and confirm that everything is still set as you are about to hand in your notice and need assurance that it’s safe to do so. Once they say “Kav, sorry about the delay, yes the offer is still set. We’re looking forward to having you.” Then go and tell your bosses.

  2. Is there no way they could fax you some initial offer? If you don’t hand your notice in now that means you’ll have to have a second party later on to celebrate your leaving. Two parties are surely better than one right?

    By the way – does anybody actually do work on a Friday? – here at the – how shall I call it – The Collected Countries Organistation – I’m pretty sure we all just turn up for the show on a Friday (and most Wednesdays and the occasional Monday too).

  3. Why don’t you get stoned before going out, so you won’t be able to talk?

  4. Why not just give everyone you work with your blog URL? Then it’s all done for you isn’t it.

  5. For the life of ya, don’t hand in your notice until the contract’s signed. Anything could happen.

    If you’re that scared of letting something slip at the session this evening, don’t go. Say you forgot that Linzi was going out and you have to babysit. Be terribly upset about it.

    Then go get hammered elsewhere and tell anyone who’ll listen that you’re jacking the job.

    Too sensible?

  6. Bloody hell this is really tricky. Generally I would say nothing until the ink is dry. You would be amazed what can go pear-shaped. Your manager could take the hump and ring new company, blacken your name etc. New company could back out etc

    The only way might be to tell your manager that you have been offered and job and you are considering it over the weekend and will confirm with him early next week. As you really love your current job it is a difficult decision but thought it only fair to let him know?

    The logical thing is say nothing and not to go to the piss-up. Is your future career worth one night of boozing?

  7. I’m with Primal.

    I’ve seen some awful things happen, even between offers and jobs. Worst ever was in 2003 when they hired 4 of us to hire another 40. We interviewed tons and sent out the first set of job offers and the following day the whole project was cancelled! Job offers had to be rescinded and we were axed a while later.

    That’s worse case but you really shouldn’t say a word until you sign the offer and put it in the post.

  8. Kav, it’s a no-brainer. It doesn’t matter what their intentions genuinely are, until things actually come to pass and you’ve signed whatever you need to sign you would be on the mad side to hand in your notice – especially given your desire to be secure. And by mad I mean putting your family at risk.

    Go get plastered, and have fun trying not to blurt out to somebody sober enough to understand or remember, but even that is as nothing compared to the oother worst case scenario.

    As Bob Marley said, No contract, no quit.

  9. Head down,mouth shut and don’t even think of telling anyone about it until you have a contract in your paw.
    If you have to stay away from tonight’s bash to do that then it really is a small price to pay.
    Just think of all the petty,evil jealousies and other stupid fuckery that could come your way if some bevvied manager type decides to be a bollix.
    I’ve had job offers pulled from me at the last second more than once and they were all ‘dead certs’.
    No such fucking thing.

  10. Belated congratulations on the job! You rock.
    I reckon go out, get shitfaced, and remember at all times that you still work for the present company. Also remember that it’s your workmate’s night so celebrate his leaving, not yours; you’ll have your own party. It does sound a bit risky to say anything before things have been formalised.
    Have a great night out.

  11. Thanks a lot everyone. The running theme seems to be to shut up and say nathin, which I will endeavour to do. No way I’m missing the night out though.

  12. Saw nowt until the ink on the contract is dry.

  13. Say nothing until the deal is done, my wife made the mistake of turning down one offer to take a much better paid one only for the tosser who offered the job didn`t know the position was already filled in house. So she ended up with no job for about a month because she had already handed in her notice, things got that tight I nearly had to go and get a job myself. Congratulations on your new one by the way.

  14. Go and get shitfaced, and kickoff the night by telling everyone crazy stories that are obviously complete bollocks. That way, should you let it slip later on that you’re leaving , noone will believe you. Think boy crying wolf.

    Kudos on the new job!

  15. Ah god all the sensible people got here before me so all Ill say is enjoy the boozing.

  16. Kav. I pity your dilemma. In times like this I contemplate what others would do.

    1) The decision a military man would bring to resolve this issue would be to kill everyone at your present company with a Kalashnikov.

    2) An architect would, on the other hand, build a giant greenhouse replacing the glass with lead so anything they said couldn’t be heard outside.

    3) An umbrella would pop up and say nothing of any great importance.

    4) But a german would say it all in a language no-one really understands.

    Therefore, go with option 4. Buy lots of German beer and only speak in German. Then yo can tell them anything you like and you’ll be safe

  17. Stuff your mouth full of gummi bears so you can’t utter a word.

  18. Cheers folks. I think JL’s plan just might be crazy enough to work.

  19. I’m not superstitious, but if you breathe a word of the new job, the Job Fairies will hear you and will cook up a problem with your contract and it’ll be withdrawn and it will all be done by magic.

  20. Agreed looby. Mum’s the word.

    Word.

  21. Do your best to keep ciuin, Kav, though drink loosens the old tongue …

    Loose lips lose lives as the US ARmy might say in between shooting at each other.

  22. As they ushed to say on the Dole line – tell them nathin ! Under now circumstances do you give notice without contract. Also I’m with JL Pagano, that’s a perfect plan
    congrats, happy boozing (although with the time diff your probably hammered now already)

  23. I cured myself of drunken dialing by telling myself over and over to not use the phone AT ALL when drinking (no answering calls, either). Somehow it worked. Perhaps you could just tell yourself that you can’t say anything about the job. It’s worth a shot.

  24. I’m with all the sensible people. Say nowt. Do nowt. Can’t wait to hear what happens!!!


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