He got what now when?

June 6, 2007 at 11:07 pm | Posted in raarrrrrr, stray cat in a vice, the most evil laugh in the entire world, writing | 45 Comments

I’ve been here, in the background, late at night, just before bed. I’ve read your comments, and chuckled in a handsome baritone at your wit. Three days in, you see, and it’s cold turkey all the way. I have work to do, and it’s not a pleasant feeling.

You know what’s a worse feeling than that? Starting a new job on a Monday morning and being told your position is at risk when you get taken over next month. Next month! It’s your first day, so you are entitled to nothing. NOTHING. A week’s notice, a week’s pay, shove that up your hole and feed and keep your family and piss the fuck off you horrendous cunts.

Nothing’s definite, of course. We’ll have to wait and see. Those of you I’ve mailed will have seen this already, but that’s how sapped I am, copying and pasting. Forgive me my indiscretion, for pulling out this bit: Getting this job, great though the salary and benefits are, has made me realise how fucking soul-sucking corporate life is, how much I detest everything about it. I wish to fuck I was able to do something creative instead of something that strangles any sort of creative impulses before they have a chance to go anywhere.

So it is. Foolish self-satisfaction versus doing what’s important. You can’t have both.

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45 Comments »

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  1. Fingers crossed for you, Kav.

  2. Kav

    That’s such bullshit. But it seems to me, (warning – I am not a lawyer), being hired by one company, then handed over to a company that they outsourced to, but didn’t hire or interview you, has a whole bunch of legal minefields around it. Not to mind laying you off and the end of it all. I manage people world wide, and my experience is that there is a lot more protection for employees in Europe, (misplaced sometimes, try firing someone who deserves it in France, it’s impossible), than in the US. That said I think even over here this could be grounds for a lawsuit.

    Seriously you might want to talk to a lawyer about the in’s and out’s of this. At least to have it in your back pocket should the decided to lay you off.

    Didn’t you sign an employment contract with the initial company ? Did they then ask you to sign a new one with the Outsourcer ?

  3. I’ll send good vibes over the pond for you! Good luck.

  4. God Kav, that’s a bloody worry, all right. I’m sorry. I think John’s right, although hark at the pair of us – pretty obvious what country we live in. It might be a good idea though to get some idea of your legal position or get someone in the legal know on your side.

    But you have these niche IT skills and that could well weather you through.

    The very best of luck to you – that kind of uncertainty is crap. I really hope it works out well and that it happens soon.

  5. “….how fucking soul-sucking corporate life is, how much I detest everything about it.”

    Seems to me you’re the type of person who will take steps to get out, when the time is right. For now though, at least Linzi and the kids are benefitting from your sacrifices.
    For me, over the past couple of years i would have ditched the job i was in if it wasn’t for Angie & Liam. Playing with Liam when i got home in the evening just made it all worthwhile and all the work shite just faded away for a couple of hours.

  6. don’t happen to work for SAIC do ya?

  7. Well that sucks some major arse!

    Hang in there Kav. No point stressing before you know what’s what.

  8. You’ll be alright Kav I have faith and if you have to get another job you’d make a good rent boy, no really Kav I’d hire you.

  9. Kav, I’m hoping for good things for you.Corporate bastards are just that but hopefully you won’t be affected.you just show them what a nice, intelligent anf very funny fucker you are and keep your chin up.Please God in a months time we’ll all laugh at this.

  10. Kav, I think JohnMc has it right… unless they can say they gave you some kind of notice of what was happening so that you could reconsider your position. Speak to a lawyer/solicitor or trade union that deals with employment law locally and have your armoury fully loaded, just in case.

    “Outsourcing” is the corporate world in all its rank shittiness – who knows how long the outsourced contract will last, and the work could be shifted to some other part of the planet if the bottom line requires it. People do not matter.

    The world does have a lot of well paid contract IT work – €250 a day for six months is not unusual in Dublin, for instance.

    You’ll land on your feet, one way or another, and your family will be ok. The rest – longer term – is down to working your way out of what you’re at and into what you’d rather be at, which I guess is where the blog is leading you.

  11. Putting on my big Pollyanna hat, maybe this is meant to be and forces you to follow your creative zen! However that doesn’t pay the mortgage so I’ll shut the F up.

  12. If you want to kill your family, do something creative for a living. You’ll all starve. On the plus side if you move back home you’ll never pay tax again, but you also wont be earning anything doing a creative job (unless you’re Enya or Bono).

  13. So what you’re saying is that you need some people to suddenly drop dead, and make you essential. Got it, mum’s the word, I’m on it.

  14. Fuck, what a shitty way to start a new job but like Steph said, no point in stressing ti you know exactly what’s going on. Wishing for the best for you.

  15. Sucks, my fella. I’ll be emailing yis later.

  16. stay cool kav, stay cool. I blame thatcher the bastard. But then again i blame thatcher for everythng. I tripped the other day and yelled “fuck you thatcher, just leave me alone you bloody milk snatcher”. Which had nothing to do with anything, much like this comment. carry on…

  17. Yikes, pressure, more pressure than a chap really needs. I’m sure your job will be fine though. Fingers crossed.

  18. Keep your head down, Kav and retain legal counsel on this. You’re a young man and have plenty of life left outside the corporate rat race. What’s that line from “Office Space” where Joanna tells Peter that most people hate their jobs but they find something in their life that makes them happy? That’s the sentiment I’m getting at.

  19. Kav,
    All this advice is intended as being proactive measures
    I’m trying to remember – they headhunted you out of your last job correct? Had you interviewed elsewhere? Start reaching out again to peers, ex bosses etc just letting them know that everything isn’t kosher where you are. That way if something is coming up at their company they will have you in mind and you won’t hear the “I didn’t think you’d be interested so I never called you”.
    Second, start familiarizing yourself with contract opportunities and tailoring a resume/CV to your strengths and your most marketable skills. You’re ready to rock then if the worst should happen.
    Thirdly don’t focus at all on the negative at work if possible, soldier on, bank the difference in pay as emergency money etc. Make friends with those above you because you may follow them to a new position if all should fall asunder.
    This is not pessimistic but practical. Like John and Problemchildbride I’m in the US too where job security is similar to an elephant atop a house of cards. We advise all to be in a constant state of self preservation in a nofault firing culture.

    Regarding satisfaction – while I am lucky enough to actually enjoy my job I figured out a long time ago that it was only a means of generating a paycheck. Anything I really gave a shit about was outside my job. This was really brought into focus when my 2 day old infant was lying in front of me with his chest split open after open heart surgery. So go generate the paychecks and follow the steps above to ensure that they will continue on a somewhat steady basis.
    Now get up, wipe your eyes ya big girl’s blouse and go kick some ass!!!

  20. I think EashtGalwaywoman pretty much sums up what my course of action would be in this scenario. Others also have some great advice. I’m also in the US, you could fart and get shit-canned for it. Regardless, I hope you fears turn out to be unfounded. But I think a guy like you will be able to take care of your family no matter what life throws at you!

    Best – Mark

  21. Everything they all said, and then some. Especially not to worry too much until you at least know what you have to worry about. Then, of course, you can just go for it.

  22. Aw crap – I can’t believe it. Well I have my fingers and toes crossed for you maybe it’ll all turn out good. Ah of course it will.

  23. Kav, I hope it all works out for you.

    I know what you mean about the whole corporate thing. Here’s to hoping for a better world that allows us to tell the Man to kiss our asses.

  24. Idlers Guild Kav!!!!

  25. Fingers crossed, Kav. What a lousy way to start a new job.

  26. What a pack of absolute bastards!I hate to say this but lawyer up my friend.Show them no fucking mercy because they won’t even pause before screwing you over.
    Hate to be this negative and maybe it’ll all blow over (all digits crossed for that) but keep the claws sharpened just the same.

  27. Really sorry to hear that Kav – hope it all works out for you. The only thing about the IT sector is while it’s never secure there’s always something else out there so hang in there!

  28. Folks here have expressed better words to give advice than I would have.

    Sending you good vibes and hugs.

  29. Got my fingers crossed for you over here, Kav. The waiting must be horrible. Is there anyone in the new company you could speak to to put your mind at ease about your position?

  30. I have no intelligent advice for you. It’s a pain in the bollocks.

    Best of luck with Corporate Man.

  31. lawyer up is the best advice…*hugs* because i dont know whatelse to say/do, sugar…

  32. I have just been liberated from corporate life (what in the 80s would have been dubbed “unemployed” is now known as “retired”) I lived with corporate shite for the last 6 years after having had my own shop for about ten years. Got pissed off with the many numbnuts telling me how to play the game and opted out…best decision ever.

    I’m taking the Summer off to “find myself” and then taking the wife and 3 kids on an “adventure” to Oz for a year. Could all go horrribly wrong and end up selling “big issue”, but I am in better form than ever – got control back and interested in life again.

    Fuck the system -it’s full of cunts anyway. Life is too short -we’ll all be dead long enough and many, many, many other cliches…..

  33. if you have talent you don’t need a job…..that’s why god invented consultants

  34. God…it’s like we’re living identical lives across a big fatty ocean and a couple of states. Only yours is probably better since you have universal healthcare. Bastard.

    Anyway…I can’t bring myself to offer any words of encouragement or advice as I’m stockpiling them ALL for myself. But I WILL say this…if you’re anything like me you’ll stay as much like yourself as you can stay despite working with droids at fucking Initech…and in this way, you’ll survive.

  35. bastards – hang in there Kav.

  36. So…..Are you alright Kav…radio silence has us worried about you..

  37. Ditto to everyone’s comments re: talk to an employment lawyer.

    On the subject of work vs art, you strike me as a guy who doesn’t do anything half-assed, so you probably give 200% of yourself at work, at home, on your blog, etc, and when one of them (your work in this case) gives you NEGATIVE 200% in return, it’s a real kick in the ass–very disenchanting.

    My husb and I are musicians with non-music jobs, so I can kind of relate, although I don’t have the responsibility of kids, and that makes a world of difference… But anyways I took the leap into the abyss (aka “freelancing”) a few years ago and I’ll tell you, Kav, I’ve never made a better decision than to just “give it a try.” Lots of people thought I was crazy, but I’ve never looked back.

    One thing I found is that since I forced myself (against my Capricorn nature) out of corporate dependency I now have a lot more confidence in myself, especially my resourcefulness. You strike me as a guy who could make a go of just about anything.

  38. As worrying as things are Kav, you have more control than you know. Don’t yield it to them – it’ll be so much better in your own hands.

  39. Hey Kav, hope all’s well.

  40. Good luck with finding a more creative job. You are worth so much more than whatever crappy stuff you are doing now. I am so glad I got out of the rat race.

  41. Hoping everything’s all right there, Kav.

    Best to you, buddy.

  42. Thank you so much everyone. Situation is: it’s legal, and there’s not much I can do about it. I have two options, briefly as follows:

    (a) Go to the new company, guaranteed position (but not senior, which is what I am here) and same terms and conditions (including salary). The work would be interesting, but my CV would not look as good. Also, not sure about future prospects.

    (b) Go for a job with current company – they’re holding on to one senior IT person. Advantages are good conditions and benefits, definite payrises and bonus scheme. Disadvantage is work is very different from what I’m used to, and it would be an incredibly difficult 12-18 month learning curve. Don’t know if I’m able for it.

    All I want to do is earn money and leave work at work. It’s dominating my every thought these days, which is a real bastard.

    All your comments mean a lot to me, so thanks.

  43. Fuck me, that last bit sounds just like a “your call is important to us…” line. Trust me, ’twasn’t manufactured, I mean it.

    Christ, I NEED OUT.

  44. Kav

    Go for B – my take is if you gotta work, get as much out of it as you can. Everyone thinks they are not able for the next job up, but then you discover that most of the tossers who are doing that job haven’t a clue either. You seem like a capable diligent sort, (despite blogging at work;)), you’ll learn it. And – at the end of the day you’ll be better off, more qualified etc

    You know my email – if you ever want to run it by me, (being in a similar industry, feel free..

  45. Thanks John.


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